I can't imagine my life without dogs. I've had one or two dogs non-stop from the time I was 21...43 years? How is that possible. We tried to have them when I was a kid, but my parents didn't know how, and expected me, at 7 to be in charge of a 75 pound golden retriever who loved to chase squirrels while dragging me through our neighborhood on my belly because I was afraid if I let go of her leash I'd never see her again. A good case of road rash and a neighbor kid pushed through the glass of our French doors by our enthusiastic Pepper (yes, Pepper Tepper) put an end to her residence in our home. The loss was so deep for me that I vowed to have pups when I was a grown up! So, yes. I've kept my word. I love my little life-mates. Nothing as good as a cuddle with a pup. Nothing comes close. xo
Pepper Tepper! I so wish her story had end more happily (although, when it comes to dogs, some kind of sadness does turn up at the end). I bet you have the happiest, best loved dogs.
I wish it had ended more happily as well. We tried again with a smaller little beagle I named Pippin, after the musical, when I was in 6th grade. That didn't work out so well either. A story for another day. I've made up for it in my later years. It doesn't matter when they leave you, there's always sadness. "Nan's best friend." xo
Thank you for this, Rona. I haven't really cried since Sugar died just over a week ago. I said it was all good. She was old and so tired. But your words finally released my tears and that felt right.
It’s never good to lose a dear dog. I’m glad this essay unlocked your heart. Although my acute grief for Casey is over, I still see him and think of him, and will always adore him. When Paul and I talk about our Chica, we also talk of how different she is from Casey.
My Cavalier King Charles Spaniel, Annie, recently demonstrated the heart-tether that your first dog felt without his collar. I live in the suburbs in Michigan and Annie is never off leash outdoors. On a morning walk last week with a whiff of spring in the air, Annie’s nose led her eagerly from one delightful scent to the next. We walked to the backyard and I let go of her leash as she continued her explorations, oblivious to anything more than an inch above the ground. She got about 20 yards away from me and suddenly realized there was no tension on her leash. She pivoted on the spot and sat, gazing at me with her big dark eyes that plainly said, “mom, we’re supposed to be connected to each other!” She stayed planted until I walked over to her and knelt down so she could snuggle her face into my neck, which is Annie-language for “please don’t ever let me go.”
Yes, love has a collar. Not too tight. Just reassuring.
"I came to see that love, if you’re going to stay the course, entails a degree of servitude" That line gave me pause. I immediately recognize the truth in it. But it also immediately brought to mind the more common attitude these days, I think, of "We're not gonna take it". I expect plenty has been written about the difference between the two but at the moment I'm not up to unstacking that!😊
The tension between love and freedom! Virtually the story of my life, which I cannot tell here, because my doggies have been just a minute part of it. My story has to remain private…for now anyway. But I loved reading yours. Your writing always amazes me, amazement seeker!
When my friend recommended your book, I was much too raw to read it, having just lost my 8 year old. Never, I swore, could I go through it again. No more dogs. The grief worse than any pain I'd experienced. But of course I later read your book (my friend was on the money; I loved it) and saw your Casey on Pakin. In time the wound scabbed enough for us to adopt a 1 year old dog. I now understand a greater depth of love than ever. I couldn't bring myself to keep her pink collar, but my girl's tags live in my bedside table... thank you for putting words to what's left unspoken in so many hearts!
Julie, I’m grateful for your support of my book. Could I persuade you to post a review at Amazon or Goodreads, if you do that sort of thing? It really does help—I always red Amazon reviews before making the purchase at my indie bookstore. Btw, I’ve been waiting to reread Starter Dog myself and relive my best memories of Casey. At last I’m ready.
We are dogless for the first time in our adult lives. We do share Papou the Failed Service Dog, when his deaf owner lets us take him for breaks in the country. (And P loves us, and it helps.) Our reason for not replacing Raisin, whose collar I have on a coat hook, is our plan to soon spend most of each year out of the country. Flying a canine below cabin is not something we’re willing to do. So travel in this era wins. But it’s hard to live with this canine hole in our hearts. And it’s another sign for us that things are not ok.
We felt the same way about a dog in the hold. Chica is pretty small so might be able to travel in the cabin. We’ll see. At our age, we know we don’t have many years left for travel. Or dogs.
Yes, you are right. Love is much more important than travel. We don't have a dog but we have a grandson who is part of our household for 2/7 of the week. A lot of love there. We wouldn't have it any other way. And yes, we could travel (so could you), but we do so very little.
Actually, after years of fostering - not to toot my own horn - I have learned a lot about dog ailments. Can’t afford a vet visit for every little thing. And here inBeize we got a shortage of vets to start with.
Loved reading about your dog. There is a dog in my life, well, she's gone now, and I feel compelled to write about her. I'm just not ready to feel the feelings and go down into the grief pit yet. You are inspiring me to keep trying.
Thank you, Janice. The most authentic writing arises from deep feeling. It can be tough to sit with the feeling while exploring every crevice, as you must to tell the story. If you become agitated, that’s a good sign.
I may have mentioned that we are currently between pets. I'm not convinced this is our forever mode. My other half hasn't yet acquiesced, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to win the debate.
I appreciate how well you captured the nature of love here, Rona. I'm still pondering whether the word servitude resonates with me or not. I see service in there, which is certainly true. I laughed out loud at you majoring in English and altered states!
So glad you and Chica found each other and that Casey helped pave the way. Where did you end up putting the collar? :)
Service is a better word, I think. I understand your resistance to servitude. Casey’s collar sits on my bookshelf for now, and maybe forever. Here’s to your next pet. Other halves (the keepers) understand that if their spouse ardently desires something, they are wise to go along.
I can't imagine my life without dogs. I've had one or two dogs non-stop from the time I was 21...43 years? How is that possible. We tried to have them when I was a kid, but my parents didn't know how, and expected me, at 7 to be in charge of a 75 pound golden retriever who loved to chase squirrels while dragging me through our neighborhood on my belly because I was afraid if I let go of her leash I'd never see her again. A good case of road rash and a neighbor kid pushed through the glass of our French doors by our enthusiastic Pepper (yes, Pepper Tepper) put an end to her residence in our home. The loss was so deep for me that I vowed to have pups when I was a grown up! So, yes. I've kept my word. I love my little life-mates. Nothing as good as a cuddle with a pup. Nothing comes close. xo
Pepper Tepper! I so wish her story had end more happily (although, when it comes to dogs, some kind of sadness does turn up at the end). I bet you have the happiest, best loved dogs.
I wish it had ended more happily as well. We tried again with a smaller little beagle I named Pippin, after the musical, when I was in 6th grade. That didn't work out so well either. A story for another day. I've made up for it in my later years. It doesn't matter when they leave you, there's always sadness. "Nan's best friend." xo
Thank you for this, Rona. I haven't really cried since Sugar died just over a week ago. I said it was all good. She was old and so tired. But your words finally released my tears and that felt right.
It’s never good to lose a dear dog. I’m glad this essay unlocked your heart. Although my acute grief for Casey is over, I still see him and think of him, and will always adore him. When Paul and I talk about our Chica, we also talk of how different she is from Casey.
"Love is a collar I wore in gratitude." A beautiful sentence that contains multitudes, even for those of us who don't have pets.
Thanks, Margaret. I believe it applies to all loves, including creative work.
My Cavalier King Charles Spaniel, Annie, recently demonstrated the heart-tether that your first dog felt without his collar. I live in the suburbs in Michigan and Annie is never off leash outdoors. On a morning walk last week with a whiff of spring in the air, Annie’s nose led her eagerly from one delightful scent to the next. We walked to the backyard and I let go of her leash as she continued her explorations, oblivious to anything more than an inch above the ground. She got about 20 yards away from me and suddenly realized there was no tension on her leash. She pivoted on the spot and sat, gazing at me with her big dark eyes that plainly said, “mom, we’re supposed to be connected to each other!” She stayed planted until I walked over to her and knelt down so she could snuggle her face into my neck, which is Annie-language for “please don’t ever let me go.”
Yes, love has a collar. Not too tight. Just reassuring.
Good girl, Annie! Good girl! This is why we have dogs.
That dog thinks the leash is for you : )
Yes, no doubt!! 😆
Freedom’s just another word for nothin’ left to lose.
Thanks for connecting Herbert and Dylan and the two types of collars.
Beautiful essay!
And thank YOU for bringing in Kris Kristofferson. I never realized, when I first heard that lyric, how terribly sad it is.
Funny—I associate the lines with Janis Joplin—but still, very sad!
"I came to see that love, if you’re going to stay the course, entails a degree of servitude" That line gave me pause. I immediately recognize the truth in it. But it also immediately brought to mind the more common attitude these days, I think, of "We're not gonna take it". I expect plenty has been written about the difference between the two but at the moment I'm not up to unstacking that!😊
Judy, I had to catch my breath writing this. Many would say, “Seriously?” It sounds so old-fashioned. But I believe it without question.
The tension between love and freedom! Virtually the story of my life, which I cannot tell here, because my doggies have been just a minute part of it. My story has to remain private…for now anyway. But I loved reading yours. Your writing always amazes me, amazement seeker!
Thank you, dear Susan. I think you have to be a certain ge to know this tension is real and unavoidable.
When my friend recommended your book, I was much too raw to read it, having just lost my 8 year old. Never, I swore, could I go through it again. No more dogs. The grief worse than any pain I'd experienced. But of course I later read your book (my friend was on the money; I loved it) and saw your Casey on Pakin. In time the wound scabbed enough for us to adopt a 1 year old dog. I now understand a greater depth of love than ever. I couldn't bring myself to keep her pink collar, but my girl's tags live in my bedside table... thank you for putting words to what's left unspoken in so many hearts!
Julie, I’m grateful for your support of my book. Could I persuade you to post a review at Amazon or Goodreads, if you do that sort of thing? It really does help—I always red Amazon reviews before making the purchase at my indie bookstore. Btw, I’ve been waiting to reread Starter Dog myself and relive my best memories of Casey. At last I’m ready.
Of course—I reviewed last year ;)
Julie, thanks so much. Many readers who enjoy a book will skip this step.
We are dogless for the first time in our adult lives. We do share Papou the Failed Service Dog, when his deaf owner lets us take him for breaks in the country. (And P loves us, and it helps.) Our reason for not replacing Raisin, whose collar I have on a coat hook, is our plan to soon spend most of each year out of the country. Flying a canine below cabin is not something we’re willing to do. So travel in this era wins. But it’s hard to live with this canine hole in our hearts. And it’s another sign for us that things are not ok.
We felt the same way about a dog in the hold. Chica is pretty small so might be able to travel in the cabin. We’ll see. At our age, we know we don’t have many years left for travel. Or dogs.
Yes, gotta have both! Somehow.
Yes, you are right. Love is much more important than travel. We don't have a dog but we have a grandson who is part of our household for 2/7 of the week. A lot of love there. We wouldn't have it any other way. And yes, we could travel (so could you), but we do so very little.
Ah, yes, your grandson of the cheery umbrella. You are lucky to have him close by (as if you needed me to tell you).
Having had dogs now for 45 years, I can relate.
Started out with one, and it snowballed from there. Due to having been a dog foster, I now have a pack of 10.
I wouldn't trade my lifes with dogs for anything
A pack of ten! You are the doggiest of dog folk. Maybe I should bring all my doggie questions to you.
Actually, after years of fostering - not to toot my own horn - I have learned a lot about dog ailments. Can’t afford a vet visit for every little thing. And here inBeize we got a shortage of vets to start with.
I like your approach.
Thank you, Kae. I'll be back with a new piece tomorrow and hope you'll drop in.
Love this! So well written! ❤️
Thank you, Mary. I’m glad.
Your essay is as elegantly composed as any 17th century lyric, Rona. But I found myself thinking instead of Edward Lear:
Never -- never more, -- Oh! never,
Did that Cricket leave him ever,--
Dawn or evening, day or night;--
Clinging as a constant treasure,--
Chirping with a cheerious measure,--
Wholly to my uncle's pleasure
(Though his shoes were far too tight)
From: "Incidents in the Life of
my Uncle Arly"
In my reading, the cricket is like your dog and the tight shoes are like the collar of love you mention, inspired by Herbert.
Thank you, Jeffrey. A rare pleasure to find Edward Lear and 17th-century lyrics in one comment. I must find that poem.
Loved reading about your dog. There is a dog in my life, well, she's gone now, and I feel compelled to write about her. I'm just not ready to feel the feelings and go down into the grief pit yet. You are inspiring me to keep trying.
Thank you, Janice. The most authentic writing arises from deep feeling. It can be tough to sit with the feeling while exploring every crevice, as you must to tell the story. If you become agitated, that’s a good sign.
I may have mentioned that we are currently between pets. I'm not convinced this is our forever mode. My other half hasn't yet acquiesced, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to win the debate.
I appreciate how well you captured the nature of love here, Rona. I'm still pondering whether the word servitude resonates with me or not. I see service in there, which is certainly true. I laughed out loud at you majoring in English and altered states!
So glad you and Chica found each other and that Casey helped pave the way. Where did you end up putting the collar? :)
Service is a better word, I think. I understand your resistance to servitude. Casey’s collar sits on my bookshelf for now, and maybe forever. Here’s to your next pet. Other halves (the keepers) understand that if their spouse ardently desires something, they are wise to go along.